Breathe
by WittyPiglet
Summary: Castiel just needed to breathe. That's all he needed to do. He was fine, everything was fine. Just breathe Castiel
1. Friday

It's okay. Breathe. Just breathe Castiel. You're okay. Everything's okay. Don't panic. Don't panic. Stay calm. You need to stay calm.

That's what he repeated in his head over and over as he stared at the forming bulge in front of his face. The man above Castiel tightened his grip in the teenager's red locks and growled in frustration. "Get to sucking before I break your fucking jaw kid." Castiel tensed and shakily reached his hands up to undo the man's pants buttons. He should have known better than to put himself in such a situation. Castiel's nose wrinkled in distaste as the older man's throbbing erection was released.

Breathe Castiel.

The cold, biting metal of a blade held against his neck is all that kept him from struggling and fighting.

Said knife was pressed harder against his delicate flesh, drawing a long line of blood across his pale neck. It was a shallow cut, but it still bled profusely. "I. Said. SUCK!" The knife was moved momentarily as Castiel's head was dragged forward. The man forced his average sized piece of rank meat was shoved into Castiel's unwilling mouth and he sighed in pleasure. Castiel squeezed his eyes shut as he shuddered and shook, willing himself to keep from letting his eyes water or to lose his lunch.

"Bite me and your little friends will feel this blade along with you."

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Castiel kept looking over his shoulder constantly for the past week. He tried to seem nonchalant about it and hoped no one noticed the slight differences in his character. To the untrained eye he looked the same as ever. But to those who knew him best: Candy, Lysander, Iris, Armin, and even Nathaniel could tell something was going on. That something was wrong with Castiel. He noticed the worried looks some of them sent him. Others like Alexy and Rosalya were even beginning to catch on. He ignored any questions asked and began to avoid them. He even avoided Lysander at this point.

Eventually he stopped going to school.

Then he stopped eating.

Then he stopped leaving his room in general except to take his precious Demon out.

It's been three weeks since the incident.

Two weeks since he stopped going to school.

A week and a half since he stopped eating.

And just mere days since he began staying in his room 24/7.

Demon could pick up on Castiel's depression. He would lay at the foot of his master's bed and make small whimpering sounds every once on awhile. He sometimes hopped up on the bed and nuzzled the teen's stomach almost as if he knew he hadn't been eating.

His phone sat on the nightstand, almost constantly going off since the fourth day of school he missed. Sure, he skipped classes on the daily but he at least made an effort to show up to school. He occasionally glanced at the collar ID but he never answered. It was mainly Candy and Lysander calling him but his other friends called every now and then too. Even Nathaniel called a couple times.

Breathe. Just Breathe. It was all he could remember how to do at this point. He felt numb as he stared at his ceiling.

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When it was bordering on four weeks of him not leaving his home, a knocking sound filled his small home. Castiel chose to ignore it as he stared at the ceiling. Demon began growling as he stalked out of the bedroom towards the front door. The knocking persisted and Demon's growling turned to full on barking.

He kept staring at the ceiling as the knocking and barking grew louder and louder in volume. His head began to hurt. He pulled himself up from his bed and made his way as slowly as possible to the door, silently hoping that whoever was knocking would go away and leave him be. But the knocking just kept going and going.

A deep breathe to relax himself and Castiel opened the door, squinting at the momentarily blinding sunlight. As his eyes adjusted they widened at the group of people crowding his front porch. Lysander, Candy, Armin, Iris, Alexy, Leigh, Rosalya, Nathaniel, Kentin, Melody, Kim, and Violette. They were all staring at him in absolute shock. Castiel knew why.

He was standing there in his boxers which now hung loosely on his hips. His red hair was messy and in desperate need of a dye job, his cheeks sunken and his eyes looked dead. He lost some of his muscle mass and you could see his ribs way more than usual. Castiel looked absolutely horrible.

"Castiel!" It was Candy. She had a look of horror on her face and tears welling up. In a semblance of normality, Castiel crossed his arms and leaned against the door frame.

"What are you all crowding my porch for?" His voice was raspy and hoarse from lack of use. Demon has longed since ceased his barking and was now peeking out from behind his master's legs at the group of visitors. At the sight of Lysander though, the large beauceron squeezed his way outside and began jumping at Lysander happily. Lysander, far too used to this treatment, pet and scratched at the dog's ears while everyone else chuckled nervously. "Down Demon." It was a quiet order from his master and Demon stopped playfully attacking Lysander. He hung his head and made his way back inside. Candy, after snapping out of the momentary daze from watching Demon, looked back at Castiel to answer his question.

"We were all so worried about you Castiel..." She bit her lip nervously and played with her thumbs. "You haven't been to school for almost a month...A-And even you don't skip that much."

"You wasted your time then..." Castiel sighed and rubbed his sore, tired eyes. "I'm fine...Now can you all please, and I mean this in the nicest way possible, get the hell off my front porch and leave me alone." Ignoring the slightly shocked and frustrated faces, Castiel went to slam the door in their faces...Only to be stopped by a black boot wedging itself between the door and its frame. A hard shove against the door sent Castiel to the ground as it was forced back open. Castiel glared up from his place on the floor at Kim as she casually sauntered into his home.

"We ain't leaving," she gave him a smirk and helped him to his feet before making herself at home on his black leather couch. Castiel had tensed at the brief touch when she helped him off the ground. Hopefully she didn't notice. The others outside almost shamefully followed Kim's lead and made themselves comfy all over his living room. "We know," Kim continued, "that something is wrong with you Knuckles, and we ain't leaving till you tell us what's up. We want to help." The others all nodded with looks of agreement, even Nathaniel gave him a concerned look.

Castiel sighed deeply and crossed his arms over his chest as he glared at them all. "Then you're gonna be here awhile because I ain't saying shit, besides," Castiel looked away from all the piercing gazes. "It's not something you guys can help with that will go away overnight." Demon gave a pitiful whimper as he stared at his master. Rosalya stood up from where she sat next to Lysander. She gave him a soft, assuring smile.

"You don't have to tell us right away, but Kim's right. We're not leaving till you talk to us. We have bags of our stuff in Lysander and Mine's cars. It's Friday and there's no school Monday either. So either way, You're stuck with us for four days." She walked up to Castiel and laid her hand on his shoulder gently in an attempt to reassure him that they are all there for him.

Not a single person missed the way Castiel tensed and flinched at the innocent gesture meant to comfort him.

"Whatever...I don't care at this point. There's two guest rooms upstairs and the couch is a futon. If you're hungry there's food in the kitchen." Castiel shrugged and turned to go upstairs but froze when a soft voice spoke up.

"Aren't you hungry Castiel...?" It was Violette in her timid voice. She was biting her lip and it seemed as if time itself had frozen as everyone stared at either Castiel or Violette.

Rosalya broke the silence first.

"When was the last time you ate Castiel...?" The red head didn't answer as he slowly began walking up the stairs. He was stopped again by Lysander's unusually cold voice.

"When Castiel?" He couldn't bare the sound of Lysander's voice like that.

The teenager turned to face the group of people in his living room. He tilted his head, almost as if confused, before shrugging. "I...don't remember." And with that he left them all to their silence, occasionally being broken by a sniffle from Candy or one of the other girls.

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Castiel hid in his room for the remainder of the night. He could hear his friends all downstairs, whispering in hushed tones. Even Demon was down there, happy for the noise instead of Castiel's silence. He didn't want them to know, he wouldn't be able to bare the looks they'd give him. What would they think? What would Lysander think? What would Nathaniel think?

He mentally slapped himself. Who cares what the prez thinks of him? He sure as hell didn't...

That's what he told himself at least.

Breathe Castiel. You're okay. It's okay. Just breathe.

Eventually there was a light knock on his door and Iris's voice rang through the wood. "Rosa made dinner Cas...She's insisting you come down and join us. She made your favorite: burgers and fries. Yours is medium rare, just how you like it..." Castiel didn't even bat an eye before answering louder than he meant to.

"Tell her I'm not hungry."

Iris didn't reply but he soon heard her scurrying footsteps fading.

Castiel's eyes fluttered shut only to widen when his bedroom door was literally kicked in. The young man jumped up and stared over at Rosalya in shock, she was furious and still had the spatula in hand. "You. Are. Going. To. Eat!" Each word was laced with venom but Castiel couldn't care less.

"Fuck of Rosa..." He turned over in bed so his back was to her and buried his face in the pillow.

Again, he heard retreating footsteps and sighed in relief.

The relief was short lived, however, as his room was barged into again causing him to jump again. This time when he looked he saw Rosalya with Lysander in tow.

"Castiel," Rosalya stalked over towards his bed. "You are coming downstairs right this instant!" He just stared at her as if she'd grown two heads.

"Excuse me?" His eyes narrowed and he glared heatedly at the snowy haired woman. "Don't tell me what to do." Rosalya reached forward and grabbed Castiel's wrist.

Everything happened in slow motion...Castiel wrenched himself away from her grasp as if he's been burned. His eyes were wide and his pupils dilated as he held his arm to his chest, shaking like a leaf.

"Cast-" Rosalya began, shock clear on her face.

"D-don't touch me..." Castiel had to choke the words out. "Don't ever touch me." He was still shaking as if he was afraid. But what would Castiel have to fear? Lysander had been silently watching in the background through this ordeal.

"B-But Cas..."

"Rosa..." Lysander's quiet voice stopped her. "Go on downstairs. Let me talk to him." Rosalya could only nod and give Castiel a concerned look before leaving.

Castiel was still shaking and tense as Lysander closed the bedroom door quietly. He quietly approached Castiel's bed and sat on the edge carefully.

"Castiel..." He began. The red head's head was bowed so Lysander couldn't see his face anymore. "Look at me." Slowly, oh so slowly, Castiel lifted his head and Lysander took a deep breathe when he saw the tears welling up in his best friends eyes. "Oh Castiel..." Lysander didn't say anything more as he slid closer to his dear friend and enveloped him in his arms. He held on to the slightly struggling boy, refusing to let him go.

"D-Don't...Let me go...Don't touch me..." Each word was accompanied by a gasping sob as Castiel continued to struggle weakly. Lysander tightened his grip and rubbed soothing circles on Castiel's shaking back.

"Talk to me Castiel..." Lysander mumbled into his ear. "Tell me what happened to you. I need to know...We need to know." Another sob escaped the young teen.

"I-I can't Lys..." He finally succumbed to Lysander's hug and buried his face in the Victorian styled fabric.

"Why Castiel? Why can't you?"

"H-He said..." Castiel choked on another sob.

"He?" Lysander's eyes widened momentarily. "Who's he?"

"I-I don't know...I never g-got a good look a-at his face..." Castiel's tears had slowed but they still trailed down his face in a steady stream.

"Did you get jumped?"

"N-Not exactly..." Another sob wrenched past his lips.

"What did he do...?" Lysander tightened his grip even more. He glanced over at the door as it creaked open and he caught sight of their friends shamefully peeking in. He glared but didn't say anything as Castiel didn't seem to notice. "Talk to me Cassy. Tell me what he did to you..." He hoped the familiar nickname his mother called him would help calm him.

"I-I can't...H-He said..." Castiel couldn't seem to be able to form proper sentences.

Breathe. In. Out. In. Out. You're okay. He's not here. It's Lysander. Lysander who cares for you. Just breathe. Stay calm. You're okay. Lysander is making it okay, just like he always does.

"Tell me what he said." Lysander glanced at the doorway again. Some of the girls and Alexy were openly crying and even a few of the boys were teary eyed.

"N..no. Lysander...don't make me tell you..I don't want to...I never wanted..." Castiel's choppy sentences were beginning to make sense to the Victorian styled man. He tensed and gently let go of Castiel. A glare from Lysander sent the others scurrying away as quietly as possible and, by some of their expressions, he wasn't the only one putting Castiel's messy way of speaking together.

"Shhhh, It's okay Cassy." Lysander soothed him gently. "You don't have to say anything. I think I know what happened." Castiel's head snapped up and his eyes welled up with more tears.

"Y-you do?" He bit his lip and more tears fell.

"Yeah," He looked Castiel dead in the eye and moved to grip his shoulders. "Listen to me though. It was NOT your fault. What he did to you was horrendous. But it wasn't your fault." The loudest sob yet escaped and Castiel clinged to his best friend's shirt, sobs wracking his lithe body. Lysander let him cry. Castiel needed too. Lysander spent ten minutes like that with Castiel until the slightly older teen cried himself to sleep in Lysander's arms.

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Lysander had tucked Castiel into bed and wiped away any remaining tears his face. His hand may have lingered longer than necessary but he's not thinking about that. Lysander left the room silently and kept the door cracked just in case Castiel needed him. The house was surprisingly silent as Lysander made his way downstairs to where the others were in the living room. He sat down next to his brother and possibly future sister in law.

Rosalya leaned her head on his shoulder and sobbed quietly. "I-Is it true Lys-baby? W-was Castiel..." She broke off in another sob. Everyone seemed to be staring at him and all Lysander could do was nod numbly. Soft gasps and cries filled the room. Nathaniel stood up silently and went upstairs without anyone noticing. He made his way to Castiel's cracked doorway and peeked inside at the sleeping form of his so-called enemy. Nathaniel stepped inside and approached the sleeping boy. He still had tear tracks staining his face and an occasional tear rolled down it.

"Oh Castiel..." Nathaniel couldn't bring himself to hate this man, no matter how hard he tried. Especially with how...how _broken_ Castiel seemed. The thought...the thought of someone _touching_... _hurting_ Castiel made his blood boil and see red. He wanted whoever did this to pay. Castiel was bad...but even he didn't deserve this.

Nathaniel pulled Castiel's desk chair over to the bed and sat in it. He stared at the sleeping boy before him and he felt his heart clench. He gently moved a piece of hair away from Castiel's face, causing the boy to shift slightly. The student body president gave a small smile and leaned back in his chair, just watching the boy sleep. Castiel's normal sneer or glare was replaced by a more serene look in his sleep. He looked like he hadn't a care in the world. But Nathaniel knew better than that.


	2. Saturday

Castiel slept well through the rest of the day and through the night. No one dared to bother the sleeping boy. Nathaniel had stayed up there the whole time he slept, much to the others' surprise and shock. It was almost as if he was guarding the broken boy who was supposed to be his mortal enemy. No one questioned him though. By the time the sun rose on Saturday morning, Castiel was beyond well rested. It was as if a huge weight had been lifted off his shoulders and he felt like he was able to...breathe. He could hear light snoring from down the hall and downstairs. When he carefully sat up and looked around his room, he was surprised to see Nathaniel past out in his desk chair and Lysander asleep on the floor with a pillow and blanket. He kind of understood Lysander being there but why would Nathaniel be? He was confused.

Quietly, as not to wake his slumbering friends...

Wait...

Friends?

Since when had he referred to Nathaniel as a friend? He never had before, so why now? Castiel shook his head and stripped right there to get changed. He actually slept pretty good. For the first time in weeks he wasn't plagued by nightmares. It was a relief in a way. Castiel pulled on a pair of pants and a baggy t-shirt before heading downstairs as quietly as possible. He stepped over Demon, who was asleep at the bottom of the stairs, and crept past Armin, Alexy and Kentin on the futon. He couldn't help but grin seeing Alexy taking advantage and snuggling up to Kentin in his sleep.

The kitchen was spotless, surprisingly.

Rosa must have gotten to it. Castiel chuckled quietly and glanced at the clock on the stove.

7:00.

Hmm, the others are most likely going to be up soon. Candy's an early riser and so is Lysander. Come to think of it Nathaniel seems like someone who woke up early too. With a shrug Castiel began pulling items out of the fridge and pans from the cabinets. He would see if Rosa would take him grocery shopping later as he hadn't planned on hosting a weekend of 12 other people.

Humming quietly, Castiel put the leaf in his table so it was longer, something he only had to do for his family during the holidays. He pulled out a few folding chairs from the pantry and set them up before he began cooking. Castiel was used to cooking as he was home alone for weeks on end sometimes and he didn't much care for those frozen store bought meals. They made his stomach roll. But, nowadays, the mere thought of eating made his stomach roll.

He continued humming as he cooked and cooked for the other occupants who insisted on staying with him over the weekend. He didn't mind cooking, he actually enjoyed it almost as much as making music with Lysander or fighting with Nathaniel.

It was 8:15 by the time he finished and plated 12 plates of food. He spent a few minutes setting them on the table and then quickly filled up his precious Demon's water and food dishes. Couldn't forget to feed his best friend, now could he? Castiel wiped the sweat from his brow and went to the kitchen's sliding glass doors, grabbing his cigarette's off the counter as he went. He stepped outside and took in a long, healthy lungful of air.

Breathe. Just keep breathing.

Castiel sat down on his back porch and lit up a cigarette. It was cool out. Not too cold, not too warm. Just the way Castiel liked it. He took a long drag of his cigarette and held it a good minute before exhaling. Ever since...Castiel shuddered...that night Castiel had been smoking more and more. Drinking too. He took another drag of his smoke, smiling as the nicotine coated his lungs.

Just keep breathing Castiel.

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The delicious smell of food is what roused the house of sleeping teens. Nathaniel groaned as he rubbed at his soar neck. Damn that was an uncomfortable night. But to Nathaniel it was worth it. A similar groan followed by a yawn told Nathaniel that Lysander was awake now as well. When the Student Body President turned to see how Castiel was he froze for a moment in shock at seeing an empty bed. He shook his head and stood up while Lysander folded the blanket he used last night. Such manners. The bedroom door was wide open and Nathaniel could see Candy, Rosalya, and Leigh leave from the closest guest bedroom and Iris, Kim, Melody, and Violette from the other. Armin, Alexy, and Kentin must be on the futon then. The smell of food awoke them too no doubt.

True to what that little cuckoo cereal bird or whatever says: they followed their nose!

As Nathaniel and the others reached the bottom of the stairs Demon awoke and they saw Kentin jumping away from a still sleeping and clinging Alexy who was startled awake at the loss of his teddy bear. Quiet chuckles and giggles hovered in the air as the group made their way to the kitchen as one, seeing as that was where the delectable smell was coming from. Jaws dropped at the sight of the table filled out with plates of steaming food. A second past before people were scurrying to find seats as fast as possible. Moans of pleasure circled around the room as not a single person hesitated to dig in.

Lysander smiled slightly as he took a bite of his omelette. Delicious as always. He chuckled quietly. "Castiel's one good cook, don't you all agree?" A few people choked on the food and others had to thump their friends on the back.

"C-Castiel cooked?!" Iris had a wide-eyed expression. "I thought this was Rosalya."

"Wasn't me. I was asleep."

Lysander chuckled again. "Castiel cooked. I can tell. He happens to like cooking and is an exceptional chef as well." The shock slowly faded and people went back to eating.

"Where is Castiel by the way?" Leigh glanced at his younger brother and squeezed his lovely girlfriend's hand. That question gave everyone pause. Castiel wasn't in his bedroom and no one else had seen him yet.

"He's probably outside or something." Kim rolled her eyes and continued to eat her food.

"I'm worried he's gonna do something stupid..." Melody bit her lip and looked around as she said this. "You have to admit...He's a little unstable..." As much as Lysander wanted to disagree, he knew the brunette was right. Castiel was emotionally unstable at the moment. There's no telling what he would do.

You know that saying? Speak of the devil and he shall appear? Well, it's true in this case as Castiel chose that moment to walk back in through the sliding glass doors with a just lit cigarette between his lips. He didn't say a word to them as he made his way through the kitchen, scratching Demon's head as he passed, and went towards the living room.

"Castiel!" Damn it Candy. He stopped and looked at her over his shoulder. "Breakfast is delicious! Thank you." Murmurs of agreement here and there. "But did you already eat before we woke up?" Silence reigned. Castiel's eyes narrowed and he didn't answer as he chose to go to his room instead.

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Breathe Castiel. Keep breathing. You're okay...

But he's not. He's not okay.

Castiel was sitting on his bed with his blood pounding in his ears and his heart thudding against his rib cage like a caged animal. His vision was blurry with unshed tears and his breathing was shallow. He couldn't breathe. He couldn't breathe. He COULDN'T BREATHE! He collapsed back against his bed with his hands pulling at his long red locks. He felt bile begin rising in his throat but he swallowed it back and squeezed his eyes shut as his tears finally began to fall. His hands were shaking in his hair and his feet tingled. His stomach churned more and his body began shaking and shivering, sweat coating his pale skin.

It felt like hands were constricting his air way, cutting off any and all oxygen. The tears were now a waterfall, soaking his flushed and terrified face. The room was spinning and Castiel began hyperventilating as he couldn't get any oxygen into his system.

Breathe Castiel. Breathe. Just keep breathing.

But he COULDN'T BREATHE!

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Nathaniel frowned as Castiel left the kitchen quickly. No one spoke for a good ten minutes before Lysander finally sighed and stood. "I'll go check on him..." The Student Body President suddenly stood as well.

"I'll come with!"

More than one had shocked looks on their faces at Nathaniel's exclamation, but no one argued as the two teens left the room. The door to Castiel's room was cracked, which was odd. Castiel usually always had his door closed. Heavy panting was the first thing they heard right before Lysander silently nudged the door open.

"FUCK!" Nathaniel started as he had never heard Lysander swear before. Then he caught sight of Castiel.

The so called "bad boy" was curled up in a fetal position with his hands clenched in his hair and his face flushed. He was panting as if he couldn't breathe and he was soaked in sweat and tears. Lysander wasted no time in striding towards the bed where his best friend continued to shake. Nathaniel stood awkwardly in the doorway, watching as Lysander drew a panicking Castiel into his arms.

The young redhead began thrashing immediately upon feeling Lysander's gentle arms encircling him. The silver haired boy just tightened his grip and whispered soothing words into the boy's ear.

"Shh, you're okay Cas. Just take deep breathes. Calm down, I've got you. Nothing's going to hurt you. Breath for me."

Nathaniel felt at a lost for what to do. He had absolutely no idea how to help in Castiel. It at least looked like Lysander knew what he was doing.

A pointed look from said boy had Nathaniel drawing closer to the pair and sitting on the bed behind Castiel. He gingerly wrapped his arms around the boy and kissed his temple. He had know idea what to say but it at least looked like the musician was calming down some.

"That's it, you can do it. Just breathe Castiel. Just keep breathing."

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"Rosa?"

"Yeah, Candy?"

"Do you think Castiel is going to be okay?"

The beautiful snow-haired woman turned to stare out of the kitchen doorway and at the set of stairs.

"Yeah, yeah I think he will be. Especially with those two by his side and us here to support him. Castiel is going to be fine."

Silently, both Candy and Rosalya turned back to continue washing the dishes from breakfast.

"Good."

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It was noon by the time Nathaniel and Lysander were able to coax Castiel to come back downstairs. Just as they were about to leave the room, Iris poked her head in.

"Rosa wanted me to let you guys know that her, Leigh, Candy, Alexy, and Kentin were heading out to buy groceries."

Castiel opened his mouth to protest.

"And that Castiel isn't allowed to argue because she's paying and it's the least she can do seeing as everyone is staying so suddenly."

He closed his mouth and crossed his arms much to the amusement of the other three.

"Come on Castiel. Toss a shirt on and lets head downstairs." Lysander tossed him a plain black T from his closet as if he's done the same thing thousands of times before.

He probably has.

Nathaniel decided not to let that thought bother him too much.

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Rosalya and the others came back a few hours later with the groceries. Kim and Armin thought it was fucking hilarious that Rosa and Candy walked in with nothing and the three boys were struggling to carry all the bags in one trip.

"Need a hand?"

"No-" Alexy struggled with a few bags. "We-ah-got this!" He wheezed and dropped his bags as soon as he crossed the kitchen threshold. "See!" More chuckles and giggles.

"But you all can help put the groceries away." Rosalya clapped her hands and sauntered into the kitchen with Candy in tow. Groans and grumbling followed them as people dragged themselves up and towards the kitchen. "Where's Castiel?" She turns towards Lysander. "Is he still in his room Lys baby?"

Nathaniel tried to ignore the stinging jealousy as Rosa automatically went towards Lysander for Castiel's whereabouts.

"He's just in the shower Rosa."

"Good, he reeked."

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Castiel wrapped a towel around his waist and quietly tip-toed out of the bathroom to his room so he could get dressed. Loud noises and talking could be heard from downstairs.

They were here and he was _okay_. He just had to remember how to _breathe_.


	3. Sunday

Breathing was becoming much easier now, so much easier.

 _In and out. In and out._ He was okay. Everything was okay, Castiel. They're here. Here for him and he's okay. Just okay.

"Cassy? You hungry? We made you some snacks since you haven't been eating much this weekend." Rosalya poked her head into the redhead's bedroom. "Can we come in?" Castiel shrugged and Rosa took that as a yes. She stepped in, carrying a tray with some tuna sandwiches the way she knows he likes and a glass of orange juice. Leigh, of course, wasn't far behind her. The white-haired beauty set the tray on Castiel's nightstand and took a seat on the edge of his bed.

"Hey..."

"Hey Rosa, hey Leigh..."

"How are you feeling?" Rosa patted his leg and gave him the same sisterly smile she always gave Lysander.

"Better, I guess."

"That's good. Please eat for me? You're worrying me."

"I will..."

"We wanna see you do it." Leigh had been so quiet, not just then but during the whole weekend, that Castiel almost forgot the other man was there.

"Seriously, dude?"

"Yes, seriously. Now eat, or do I have to feed you?"

"Tch. Fine..." The guitarist reached over and grabbed one of the tuna sandwiches. They were cut into triangles and the bread was toasted. Rosa really knew him well. "Thanks."

"Hello Castiel." Violette smiled shyly as she took a seat beside him on the couch.

"Hey, Vi." Castiel gave her a small smile in return and the two sat in a comfortable silence, neither saying much more than a word or two to the other. It was comforting and nice just sitting there with someone who wasn't badgering him on his well being, all hours of the day.

It was just so nice and one of the reasons Castiel was slowly starting to like Violette more and more. She was a nice, sweet girl and deserved the world in Castiel's opinion and he would break the jaw of anyone who dared to hurt her.

She was one of the people who made it easier to breathe.

And he kept breathing.

"You almost done with your shower, Cas? I gotta piss." Without waiting for a single reply, Kim barged into the bathroom, Candy hot on her heels with a giggle trying to stifle itself behind her hand. They could both hear the redhead swear and he poked his head out from behind the shower curtain, hair soaked and dripping with water and soap suds.

"Kim?! You too Candy? Can't a man have privacy in his own home?"

"Not when I have to piss, and there's one bathroom with over ten people staying in the same house." Kim pushed her shorts and panties down her legs and sat on the toilet to relieve her bladder without a care that Castiel was still looking out from behind the curtain. Candy hopped up to sit on the counter, the bathroom door still wide opened. For once, red to match his dyed hair spread across Castiel's cheeks.

"Seriously? You two have zero decency."

"Oh well," Candy shrugged. "Besides, it's not like I haven't seen it before~"

"What?!"

"Mm, I may or may not have snuck into the boys' locker room. On more than one occasion."

"Candy!"

"No."

"Oh, c'mon!"

"I said I don't want to play."

 _Breathe. It's okay._

"Come on, I brought this game and my system all the way over here for us to play! It's a great game!"

"I really am not in the mood to play Mortal Kombat."

"It's not just _any_ Mortal Kombat though! It's Mortal Kombat _11_. The newest and so far my personal favorite! I saved up for months before it came out!"

Castiel eyed the controller that had been thrust into his hands and sighed. "Fine….I'll play." He glared at the blue-haired twin over his brother's head. He could see him trying to hide his snickering and mouth the words _'good luck'_ to him.

Jerk. Leaving him to suffer while he makes goo goo eyes at military boy across the room, who, in turn, was making goo goo eyes at Candy through the kitchen doorway.

Armin picked Raiden and Castiel chose Baraka. Something about Baraka just spoke to him in a twisted way. The matches were short, Armin was just too good a gamer, but that didn't mean Castiel was giving up. Their constant barbs towards each other's skills drew Kentin and Alexy to the game.

Alexy, much to his brother's horror, picked Castiel's side while Kentin opted to go for the other twin's side. Not much to say other than Castiel got his ass handed to him again and again and again.

Fuck this.

"Black would be better than red, Melody!"

"No! Red would match his hair, Iris!"

"But black would match his personality!"

"Red!"

"Black!"

Castiel rubbed his temples as the two women argued from either side of him. They were arguing over _nail polish_ of all things. He really didn't care what color they picked, or that they were going to paint his nails. He already gave up on the argument before it even started.

"Just paint each hand a different color and stop this fucking fighting, for fuck's sake."

Both girls cease in their fighting and blush in embarrassment.

"Al….right."

"I really think you should come outside besides just the back and front yards. Come on a walk with us. At least give me this peace of mind Castiel."

"I would really rather not."

Nathaniel sighed and ran a hand through his blonde locks, mussing his hair up. It was kinda cute in Castiel's opinion. "Fine, then we'll stay here until you agree to go. I can be just as stubborn as you, my friend." Friend. They weren't friends. Him and Nathaniel hated each other….or they were supposed to anyways. Fuck, his perspective of the world has been tipped upside down. Left is right, up is down, clockwise is counter clockwise. Nothing was making sense to him anymore.

"Fine...whatever, I'll fucking come with you if you'll stop badgering me." Castiel glared and grabbed his jacket off his desk's chair, slipping it on and storming out of his room, past Nathaniel as he mumbled a 'fuck you' to him. Nathaniel just kept smiling at him like an arrogant prick.

Fuck him.

"Y'all go back in, I'mma sit out here for a minute to smoke." Castiel ignored the disgusted faces of Nathaniel and a few of the other girls as he sat on his yard's front porch, cig and lighter already in hand. The others slowly headed back inside and Rosa let Demon slip out the door so he could stretch his legs.

The dog, instead jumping off the porch to run around the yard, laid beside Castiel and leaned heavily into his leg.

"Yeah, yeah. You worried about me too, huh?" Demon whimpered and nuzzled his thigh. "Thanks boy. I'm glad I have such a loyal dog like you, even if you are a mutt. Wanna play fetch? Go find your ball." Demon was up and bounding down the steps to retrieve his dirty and chewed up ball from under the porch, running to his master and dropping it onto the steps. "Good boy."

Castiel picked up the ball and threw it across the yard, careful not to let it go over the fence. Demon was off, snatching it up in his maw before racing back to Castiel and dropping it into his lap this time like a good boy. The redhead repeatedly threw the disgusting ball again and again, only for Demon to get it and bring it back with his tail wagging.

A low chuckle caught his attention when he went to throw it again. Demon frowned when he didn't toss his ball again right away, so Castiel threw it before turning to face the door with his nearly gone cigarette limp between his lips.

Lysander was leaning against the door frame with his arms crossed and a smirk in place.

"How long have you been there?"

"Long enough. You're smiling. Good, I miss Castiel's natural smiles."

"Don't get used to it, Lys."

"I want to."

Castiel rolled his eyes and threw the ball again when Demon brought it back. "Good boy." He pet the dog's head and scratched behind his ears before standing. Castiel drops the cigarette butt, stamping it out with the heel of his boot and heading inside. Lysander made it difficult to get inside without brushing past him.

"Where are you going Cas?"

"Bed, it's been a long fucking Sunday. Wake me up when y'all go home."

"Not till tomorrow night!"


End file.
